LOVING ONE ANOTHER WHEN WE DISAGREE.

Midweek Sermon  

Date:	August 05, 2026
Scripture Passage:	Romans 14:1–23
Main Bible Verse:	“For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.” Romans 14:17.

Introduction: The Noise Around Us

Praise the Lord.

Good evening, everyone. It is so good to be together tonight. Take a deep breath. Pause for a moment. Think about the world outside these doors. Everywhere you look today, there is noise, division, and fighting. People argue on social media, on the news, in offices, and even around family dinner tables.

It feels like everyone is angry about something. People are divided over politics, money, lifestyle choices, diets, health, and personal choices. This passage is so remarkably relevant to the disputes going on in our global community right now.

There are certain fundamental truths that are non-negotiable—the love of God, the salvation brought by Jesus, His life, His death, His resurrection, and His Lordship over our lives. However, there are many other things in daily life that are not nearly as important. They are ‘disputable matters’ (v. 1). They are secondary areas, such as choosing what to eat, what habits to keep, or thinking of one day as more sacred than another.

When people in our community look at us, do they see patient, welcoming love, or do they see people who just want to win arguments? In Romans 14, God’s Word speaks directly into every human heart. The message tonight is gentle, clear, and full of grace: Hold tight to God’s love, hold loosely to your personal opinions, and choose love toward everyone every single day.

The Core Purpose of Romans 14 The purpose of these verses is to enable people from all different backgrounds, cultures, and ways of thinking to live together peacefully and build true, lasting unity.

 

8 Ways to Deal with Disputes

1. Welcome Everyone with Open Arms (v. 1)

The Bible tells us to accept and welcome anyone whose beliefs, habits, or convictions are different from ours (v. 1). We are called to welcome every single person with open arms, knowing that every human life matters to God and that we will all stand before Him one day (vv. 1, 10).

When we are commanded to welcome those who see things differently, it is a call for a radical, warm-hearted embrace. It means opening our doors and our lives to others without demanding that they change their personal opinions first. Think about how God treats us. He didn’t wait for us to fix all our flawed thinking before He loved us; He wrapped His arms around us while we were still lost. When anyone walks into your life with different habits or views, do not keep them at arm’s length. Open your home, open your heart, and offer them warm, unearned grace.

2. Do Not Be Quick to Judge Anyone (vv. 1, 4, 10, 13)

We are told not to jump all over people every time they say or do something we do not agree with (v. 1). The Scriptures ask us, ‘Who are you to judge someone else’s servants?’ (v. 4) and ‘Why do you judge your brother or sister?’ (v. 10). We must stop criticizing, blaming, and passing judgment on one another (v. 13). We must allow everyone to have their own views without judging them for it. Four times in this passage we are commanded not to judge one another.

Notice how deeply important this is—four separate times, we are commanded to stop judging. It is so easy to act like a judge in another person’s life, pointing out their mistakes and assuming bad motives. But Scripture gently asks us: “Who are you to judge someone else’s servant?” Every single human being belongs to God. He created them, He knows their heart, and He alone sits on the throne of judgment. When we critique or condemn others, we are trying to sit in a seat that belongs only to God. Let down your gavel, lay down your harsh words, and leave judgment to God, who judges with perfect love.

3. Don’t Look Down on Anyone (v. 3)

We must not look down on those who have different views or habits from our own (v. 3a). God has welcomed them (v. 3b). So should we.

Pride is a quiet poison in relationships. A person who feels free in their choices can easily look down on a stricter person, calling them narrow-minded. Meanwhile, a stricter person can easily look down on a free person, calling them careless. Scripture looks at both sides and says: Stop looking down on each other. Contempt destroys human connection. When you view another person as lesser because of their personal choices, you forget that God created and loves that person. If God sees fit to love them, who are we to treat them with anything less than deep respect and dignity?

4. Do What You Believe Is Right Before God (vv. 5–6)

Living peacefully with everyone does not mean turning off your mind or ignoring your personal conscience. Scripture challenges us: ‘Each person should be fully convinced in their own mind’ (v. 5). Each person is free to follow their own convictions before God (v. 5). Whatever choice you make, do it with a thankful heart (v. 6).

Seek God in prayer, read His Word, and live out your values with honest devotion. If your choices flow from a heart that wants to do good and please God, offer them up with joy! The goal is not to force everyone in the world to act identically, but for every single one of us to live sincerely and honestly before God.

5. Assume the Best About Other People’s Motives (vv. 6–8)

Those who hold to specific special days or practical choices do so with a desire to honor God (v. 6). Give others the benefit of the doubt and assume that they are seeking to do what is right (vv. 7–8).

How much heartache could we save in our families and neighborhoods if we simply learned to give people the benefit of the doubt? When you see someone living differently than you, train your heart to assume the best about them. Don’t assume they are being rebellious, foolish, or selfish. Believe that in their heart of hearts, they are doing their best to live a good life. Mercy chooses to see the good in others, just as God saw the good in us.

6. Be Sensitive About Other People’s Consciences (vv. 13, 15)

Make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in another person’s way (v. 13). We must be careful not to cause others emotional distress or tempt them to go against their conscience by our personal choices (v. 15).

Personal freedom was never intended to be used as a hammer to hurt others; it was meant to be used as a tool to serve others. If you have the freedom to do something, but you know that doing it in front of someone else will upset them or cause them pain, love willingly steps back. Your freedom to act a certain way is far less valuable than another person’s peace of mind. True maturity means saying, “My rights matter, but my neighbor’s heart matters so much more.”

7. Help and Encourage Everyone You Meet (v. 19)

Let us agree to use all our energy in getting along with each other. Help others with encouraging words; don’t drag them down by finding fault (v. 19).

Think about how much mental and emotional energy people waste on fighting, arguing, and trying to prove they are right. Scripture offers us a breathtaking alternative: take all that wasted energy and pour it into building people up! When you speak to anyone in your life, are your words tearing holes in their heart or building them up? Every single person you meet this week is carrying a heavy burden, fighting a silent battle, or feeling tired. Refuse to drag them down by finding fault. Become the kind of person whose words bring healing, comfort, strength, and life.

8. Always Act in Love Toward Everyone (vv. 15, 21)

If someone is distressed because of what you do, you are no longer acting in love (v. 15). Be sensitive and courteous to everyone. Do not say or do things that interfere with the free exchange of love (v. 21).

At the end of the day, love is the highest duty of every human being. You can have all the right knowledge, you can win every debate on secondary issues, and you can hold the most logical arguments—but if you do not have love, you have nothing. If your opinions cause pain, division, and broken relationships, you have lost your way. The Bible reminds us that true life isn’t about maintaining small rules; it is about righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. Let love be your guiding compass in every interaction.

The Core Foundation of Life Disputable matters are not as important as what unites us all: “For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit” (v. 17). This is what really matters. Let us not get caught up in arguments over small matters that divide families, friendships, and communities. — Romans 14:17

 

Practical Ways to Encourage Others This Week

Tonight, let us look at 8 very simple, practical ways you can put these principles into action starting tomorrow morning:

1. Send a Text of Gratitude: Reach out to a family member, friend, or coworker with a simple message saying, ‘I am so thankful for you and for having you in my life.’
2. Listen Without Interrupting: When someone shares a view you don’t fully agree with, listen quietly with a warm smile instead of jumping in to correct them.
3. Pray Daily for Someone Different: Pick one person whose personality or opinions bother you. Pray every day this week for God to bless their family and give them joy.
4. Share a Meal or a Cup of Tea: Invite someone to sit with you or share food—especially someone from a different background, age group, or culture.
5. Refuse to Join Gossip: If people around you start complaining or finding fault with someone, gently change the subject or share a good thing about that person instead.
6. Yield Your Preferences Cheerfully: If choosing a place to go, a seat, or an activity causes someone else joy, let them have their way without making a fuss.
7. Offer Practical Help Silently: Look for a small burden you can lift for someone this week—bring a meal, mow a lawn, or help carry groceries without seeking praise.
8. Speak Comfort to the Hurting: When someone is going through a tough time, don’t offer complex advice. Simply offer a warm hug, a kind word, and a simple prayer.

Challenge: The Encourage-Others Challenge

Practical Focus	Action Steps for This Week
1. Speak Life	Send 3 encouraging text messages to people in your life whom you haven’t spoken to recently. Tell them specifically what you appreciate about them.
2. Pray for Unity	Pick one person whose opinions or personality bother you. Pray for God’s blessings upon their life, health, and family every day this week.
3. Guard Your Tongue	Refuse to join in gossip or critical talk about another person’s choices. If an argument starts online or in person, step away and choose peace.
4. Show Hospitality	Invite someone to sit with you, have tea, or share a meal—especially someone who comes from a different background or holds different views than you.

Altar Call: A Heart-Touching Invitation

Right now, let us quiet our hearts before God.

If you are carrying a bitter spirit tonight… if you have been holding a grudge against a friend, a family member, or a neighbor… if you have spoken harsh, judging words about someone because they don’t see things your way… this time of prayer is open for you.

Maybe you feel tired from all the fighting in the world. Maybe you have been hurt by critical words. Maybe your heart is heavy, and you just need to feel the warm, peaceful embrace of your Heavenly Father again.

God is here tonight. He is standing with open arms to receive you. He wants to wash away your anger, quiet your noisy mind, and fill you with His Holy Spirit—a spirit of righteousness, peace, and joy.

If you want to lay down your need to be right…
If you want to ask God to help you love people better…
If you need His comfort and His healing peace tonight…

Closing Prayer

Heavenly Father,

We come before You tonight humbled by Your Word. We admit that so often our hearts are quick to judge, quick to criticize, and slow to love. Forgive us, Lord. Forgive us for the times we have cared more about winning arguments than about loving the people around us.

We thank You for Your endless love. Thank You that when we were lost, confused, and full of flaws, You welcomed us with open, loving arms. You covered us with Your grace.

Lord, pour out Your Holy Spirit upon every heart tonight. Soften every hard heart. Melt away every grudge, every bit of bitterness, and every spirit of pride. Teach us how to listen to one another, how to forgive one another, and how to build each other up.

May our lives and our community be a sanctuary of peace in a noisy, angry world. When people look at us, let them not see arguments or strict rules, but let them feel Your righteousness, Your peace, and Your deep, beautiful joy.

Bless every person here tonight. Heal their wounds, lift their burdens, and send them out as peacemakers into their homes, workplaces, and neighborhoods this week.

In Jesus’ name, we pray.

Amen.

God bless abundantly.